War is causing psychological trauma

It is very difficult to live in a situation of total uncertainty and not understanding when this war will finally end. Such experiences are very exhausting and sometimes make us completely inactive, which, in turn, leads to even worse emotional states. And despite all the complexity, each of us has our own “island of safety” that cannot be taken away. It can be communication with relatives, walks, music or anything else that has always been, is and will be in our lives. This is our safe Haven, where you can always run in case you feel bad. Psychotherapy can be such a safe place, where you can share your pain, it’ll allow you to resent, think and finally just be with someone who sincerely wants to help you.

Psychologist Karina Perets will tell us how to stabilize your mental state and not fall into depression in the conditions of hostilities.

Is there any limit that will allow a person to understand that it is already worth asking for help?

At the physiological level, there is an absolute threshold. According to this, I think yes. No matter how strange it is that we suppress our anxious thoughts, we can often follow the so-called alarm bells behind us until that critical point appears. But the longer we withdraw our real view of the situation, the less visible this issue is to us. When a person looks at his own condition realistically, they will still be able to hear themself and seek help if necessary. The only question is how willing we are to accept the fact that we have been lying to ourselves all along.

How can Ukrainians, who are in a constant state of anxiety, cope with stress now?

I watched how everyone posted well-known stress relief strategies in their “stories”. Now this may sound harsh and subjective, but I believe that only 5% of people use these techniques. The brain looks for an easier way to solve problems, so most of us choose habitual activities to deal with stress. For some it is scrolling through social networks, others it is cleaning, for some it is cooking, in different ways. If after that a person really feels calmer, then why not? Why should one do something against one’s will, what is written in those posts and in theory should help the majority? I am not a fan of general methods for everyone. I think that everyone is responsible for their own emotional state, and everyone can choose their own method of calming down. For me, the best method for such people will be to listen to their inner voice, establish harmony with themselves and apply the results of reuniting with their inner self practically.

Is it okay that some people have limited themselves in pre-war things like: music, dancing, social media, watching movies, going out, etc.?

That’s up to everyone. I would equate it to spirituality, morality. If a person consciously limits himself in such things, then there are subjective reasons for this. If these are not alarm bells about future depressive states, but, on the contrary, a person feels good, then why not?

I live in the western part of the country and it feels unfair that I am safe while other parts of the country are fighting. How to deal with this feeling?

The main rule: this feeling is normal. Now every feeling is normal. Aggression, fear, sadness, injustice. The main thing is to understand that nothing specifically depends on you. You don’t choose which region of Ukraine to be born in, do you? The fact that there is no clear military action in the West does not really mean that you are completely safe. Now the entire territory of Ukraine is under threat. My words are confirmed by the recent air alarms throughout the country. Therefore, you should take care of your safety in the same way as every Ukrainian. Together we are powerful.

Top 3 tips from a psychologist that will help stabilize a person’s mental state during hostilities?

I will be concise:

  1. If possible, continue the pace of life, similar to what it was in pre-war times.
  2. Do not forget about our basic biological needs, such as: sleep, proper nutrition, basic physical activity.
  3. This time is a great opportunity to try something new. Something cherished. Something that has been put off for so long.

After the end of the war, after the victory of Ukraine, how can people continue to live, enjoy life, rejoice in it? How not to dwell on past events, not to fall into depression?

Quite an interesting question: “How to live on?” In my opinion, this process normalizes itself over time. However, if there are certain events that cause traumas, then they should be dealt with in order to keep moving. In order not to dwell on the past, you should make a bright present. How to do it? Everyone decides individually. Most often, people fall into depression uncontrollably, so the most important advice here will be: listen to yourself. If the inner voice tells you that something is wrong, you should immediately pay attention to it and, if possible, give yourself psychological first aid. It can be something very elementary, something that brings joy, like dancing in front of a mirror.

Translator: Bohdana-Nikolietta Terekhina

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